I Hate You!– How To Let Go Of Animosity Towards Others And Be Happier With Yourself
Posted by Heather Taskovics · 4 Comments
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How often have we come across people in our lives who have, in our minds, done something so terrible to us that we feel the utmost loathing and hatred towards them? Unfortunately, we all can admit to this on more than one occasion.
When we are faced with situations such as these, we basically have two choices, we can either:
a.) Hold a grudge and hate the person who has *offended* you for the rest of your/their lives, or
b.) Learn to acknowledge what the person did to instill such hatred and animosity, get past it by learning to forgive them and move on with your life.
I’m pretty much all for the latter option. The ego has difficulty with it–as it is SO IN LOVE WITH MISERY–but eventually your ego WILL get over it and you will be a much happier (and calmer!) person in the long run.
I, too, have had dealings with people who have “done me wrong” in one way or another, and have felt such seething hatred towards them. Believe me when I say that it’s JUST NOT WORTH IT. I would get so stressed out because of it and just felt absolutely miserable.
After a bit of “soul searching” and reading books like “The Secret” and “A New Earth”, I realized that I was *allowing* these people to have this effect on me, and that I have the power to change my attitude make myself happy. It was pretty amazing how quick it just clicked for me; it was as though a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders and I could finally live the happy life I always wanted.
Over time, the people that bothered me the most ended up becoming friends and acquaintences, which is definitely a better alternative to having enemies.
There are times, however, when I come across people who would typically “set me off”, but I am now able to realize what is going on, understand why the person is behaving in a certain way and how I can deal with the situation a little better.
If you find yourself in a situation where someone has offended you or has done something to tick you off, just take a moment to think about where this feeling of anger is coming from, why you are feeling this way and figure out how to move forward. Meditation can be extremely useful in this respect. More often than not, the offending person is dealing with their own problems and is subconsiously passing their negativity on to you. Kind of like when you have a bad day at the office then come home and yell at your spouse for no reason.
Just remember: WE ARE ALL HUMAN and therefore are prone to human conditions and instant reactions–nobody’s perfect–but at least we all have the ability to be more aware of our reactions and handle them more effectively. In the grand scheme of Life and The Universe, all these difficult situations are really just small things and, in the long run, are not as bad as they seem at the time.
Life really is too short–so let’s make the best of it and work towards being nicer to each other.
I would love to know your thoughts. Please leave a comment below. If you like what you’ve read, sign up for my blog and feel free to share the link on Twitter, Facebook, MySpace, etc.
Namaste,
Personal Growth from SelfGrowth.com– SelfGrowth.com is the most complete guide to information about Personal Growth on the Internet.
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To let go of animosity towards others sometimes requires lessons of learning how to forgive.
It might help to realize that forgiving someone does not mean admitting that what they did to offend you is OK. Forgiving simply means that you, in your own mind, let go of the anger. It does not mean that you have to subject yourself to the same “punishment” again from that person, or tolerate that treatment from anyone else in the future.
Jason Kerchner´s last blog ..The Myth of Free Leads Using Social Media
You are absolutely correct, Jason. Thank you so much for adding such valuable insight.
Namaste,
Heather
I can totally relate to this. The greatest gift any of us can give to ourselves is the ability to NOT be offended by what others say and do. More often than not, people do not even realize they are being offensive. On any given day, you will more than likely come across someone who offends you in some way. If we allow it, we could potentially be offended all day long! We have got to have thicker skin if we are going to succeed in life.
On the other hand, if a person wrongs you in a much deeper way where unforgiveness begins to manifest, then you must be able to address the issue head on before anger and resentment take over. Even if someone does not want to admit or apologize for a wrong that was committed against you, you can still forgive them and let the offense go. Do not give anyone the satisfaction of holding you prisoner.